not unlike the screwtape letters
Today in Church I�ve decided that it should be illegal to comb over a bald spot. I know that people with a bald spot in the back of their head (as I will soon have) can comb it all back that doesn�t really look as bad combing the hair from one side of your head over the other. I know that will insult the bald, balding and loved ones of the bald but it�s true. Everyone knows you�re bald and since baldness isn�t unattractive and is rather a sign of being virile. It�s very distracting.
It wasn�t as distracting as the kid in front of me though. Good Lord! If Dr. Spock where alive today I�d walk right up to him and spit in his eye. He once said, �My greatest accomplishment is that I got a whole generation of parents to stop spanking their children.� There is a difference between spanking and beating. Everyone I know that that doesn�t spank their kids has either awful children or beats their kids because after not using the occasional spank as a discipline tool they can�t control themselves when they decide to FINALLY curb their children�s behavior. I felt sorry for his grandparents because it wasn�t their fault that the kid was so bad. If they were raising him I would have felt less sympathy if any.
Then we moved on to the Children�s Message, which is a clue as to how the rest of the service is going to go. It�s usually a bad omen and today it certainly was. The adult sermon was about something, Palm Sunday and the Passion. I remember at my church at home being riveted by the sermons. I used to be really into going to church but now, not so much. Our sermons come with �sermon keepers� which are like Mad Libs only they�re never funny, and rarely insightful or interesting. It�s so boring that I can�t even keep up.
After church I had to go get groceries and I was glad to leave. Our church has air freshener issues. They put in these fragrances to make the place not smell like rot (because it really does and really is rotting) and it makes me sick. It comes right up to my house; it�s really terrible.
On the way to the grocery I had to drive defensively because someone was all over the road. I will admit that I�m a terrible driver but one would think that if you�re going to put �Baby on Board� on your minivan that you�d be the one driving well and not the person people should be afraid of. I don�t drive differently because of the markings on someone�s car. I don�t slow down for the police so I�m not slowing down for the baby on board.
Personally, I assume that each person in each car is important to someone, somewhere. Babies aren�t more special than anyone else; they�re just tinier. I�ve lost people of all ages in my family and while losing a baby is rough it�s always rough to loose someone you love. If you�re worried about your baby being harmed while you drive then don�t drive like a jerk.
This is too long. Good night.
