homersexual
DISCLAIMER: This entry could offend you. If you do not plan on reading carefully and paying attention, please just click over to Cree Patron.
You can read how my date started at Kipp�s Diary, where I continue to post guest entries. This one is not so good but it is how my day started, bad.
I went down to check my mail and I heard people talking in the office. I heard Adolph�s voice. I am not being silly, the man is legally named Adolph and as he is in his seventies or eighties he predates that name being out of vogue. It used to be a common German name, that and Dieter.
Adolph was aptly named, he is a first rate jerk.
They were talking about gay marriage in the office, and by �they�; I mean Adolph was pontificating about the Homosexual Agenda. I have not seen a copy of the Homosexual Agenda so I asked where he had obtained a copy of this agenda.
He admitted that he had not seen a copy of the Homosexual Agenda. But, he knew what it was. They want to: get married, own homes, and have equal protection under the law.
That is some nerve of those homosexuals!
He went on, �Those homosexual faeries think they are just like the rest of us�
I said, �The tooth faerie is a homosexual? I did not know it even had a gender!� He looked pretty pissed. He said, �You are not taking this seriously!�
I responded, �I am taking this seriously! Next thing you know, the niggers are going to want to vote and use our water fountains, bathrooms, and come to this school!� Yes, I said, �nigger� and there are several black children already in our school. �Then you will have people trying to tell us that Jews are people too and that if we tried real hard we could coax the Latinos off of the roof and into the classroom. Mexicans reading? Will wonders never cease?� Then his wife came in the office and I finished with, �You let your wife out of the kitchen with SHOES on? I only let Elizabeth have flip-flops, and those are for taking out the trash. I am telling the Republican Party on you!�
Everyone laughed at this, thankfully so did my boss who is gay, but Adolph does not know this. I also have no idea why I used Elizabeth as an example.
Adolph then accused me of being a, �liberal communist homosexual sodomite� after he reminded us that he is a Democrat, voting for Kerry.
�Communist?� I replied, �I hate cabbage! That is all communists ever eat, and they wear grey wool all the time without regard to the season. Seriously, what self-respecting homosexual would be a communist? Don�t you know anything, Adolph? Besides, I am not a homosexual or liberal. I am a HOMER sexual. You know, like Homer Simpson. And how does supporting equal protection under the law make me a homosexual? Does that also make me nigger lover Adolph? I may not be homosexual but that does not mean I cannot support everyone�s right to exist and have a life.�
There is going to come a day when white heterosexual males will longer be in power in America. Diversity will soon come to our government on all levels and it could happen, because History believes in Karma � even if you do not. History will repeat itself in that the oppressors always become the oppressed. This is not why I do the right thing; I would do the right thing anyway. When the day comes when I am in the minority demographic I want it to be in a country where not being in the majority does not nullify your rights. Too bad Adolph will be long dead when that happens; he will not have to deal with his mess.
What is a Homer Sexual? A Homer Sexual is the exact opposite of a Metro Sexual. A Homer Sexual does not regard personal hygiene or grooming, wears whatever, is only marginally aware that women had needs and feelings, drinks beer and lounges on the couch. A Homer Sexual was not involved in the decoration of the home and if they helped it was only under duress, using expertise at destroying things with manual and power tools. Your Homer Sexual may have helped you make those kids but that is where it stops. Hope you enjoyed your five minutes as much as he did.
�Click my cleavage for Creepatron!�
