Big Fish
I cried at the end of the movie and JFTB was polite enough to act like she didn�t notice. It was a touching movie. It�s a good film to see if you think you�ve misplaced your soul.
The movie was nice dinner was another story.
We went to Bertucci�s for dinner, Kipp and Ezi met us there.
Kipp got to Bertucci�s early and got on the ungodly long line so we wouldn�t all have to wait, unfortunately she was tired of people by the time we got there.
Ezi was forever because she uses public transportation and BART makes one run to Hartford in a day and we were going to have sit it out.
I was about in a diabetic coma by the time Ezi showed up and Kipp was ready to beat the kids sitting in the both behind us. We all agreed that kids shouldn�t be allowed in public until they�re fourteen or fifteen and then only to work.
Our waitress totally messed up our order as well. It was a grand mess. Ezi was too shy to point out that she�s Jewish and didn�t order the Italian sausage but Kipp and JFTB weren�t. Everything was wrong but the sausage for the Kosher Keeping Ezi was the last straw.
JFTB took the sausage and waved it in the waitress� face asking her what was wrong with this picture? Why was this sausage at our Hebrew table? The manager heard the commotion and came over to see what was up.
He asked Kipp to watch her mouth because she said Hell. He said, �This is a family establishment!� Kipp kept asking him to speak up so he�d get closer to her and talk, finally when he was in striking distance she burned him on the face with her cigarette. Then she tore off her shirt and started running around the dining room knocking plates off people�s tables and Ezi yelled, �HOLY PINATAS!� When Kipp defrocked.
When I heard pi�ata I thought there was a pi�ata so I started beating the hell out of the pi�ata-esque light fixture with Kipp�s purse. I got no-where like that so I jumped up and tried to yank it off the wall.
Half the wait staff was chasing Kipp who was running like a crazed mongoloid and the freakishly tall hostesses where trying to yank me down from the light fixture. JFTB had to escape � Ezi had a plan.
JFTB broke her foot days ago so while this was going on she was sneaking out the door with Ezi, who to cue us to leave tore open her shirt and yelled, �Say, �ta ta� to TA TAS!� and bolted out with Jenny.
It�s lucky we parked in the �Carry Out Only� section because the cops were pulling in as we were pulling out.
JFTB can drive her Mercedes with one foot like she�s the Secret Service. It was awesome, Ezi was too embarrassed to see the movie after the adventure and Kipp was tired from the running. They went home and that�s too bad.
Maybe next weekend will be better.
