still learning things I oughta know by now
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Yesterday, my sister and I threw money away on lottery tickets (one each) in the hope of winning the elusive Power Ball Jackpot. This flagrant disregard for our finances leads to the eventual discussion on how we would waste spend the money.
Most definitely, I would move to a safer neighborhood. Last night while driving home there was rat the size of a Yorkshire Terrier in the street and that was the last straw for me. If I lived in Texas, when I screamed like a girl at encountering the rat someone would have shot it. They might have shot me as well, but if that rat is dead would losing me be that bad? I think not.
The other thing I would do is hire an assistant. My sister asked what my assistant would do all day while I was teaching, what would the student say to the assistant? I said, �Kipp would burn them with a cigarette if they addressed her directly.� I do not do anything. It is absurd to assume that an assistant to Spritopias would do something.
I do like the idea of Kipp sitting at my desk in the classroom smoking cigarettes and playing on the internet while shouting commentary on my teaching, �BORING!� �WEAK!� Eventually, she would get up and pilfer the student�s lunches for Twinkies and Hershey Kisses and training them to make her martinis before passing out at her seat or pulling the fire alarm so we could leave.
I would also have to hire Colleen to come in for history class to make sure things were �fair and balanced� and to teach the children important things I cannot or need help teaching such as dancing or walking in heels while intoxicated.
My sister seems to think this would be frowned upon, but I am confident that with a large enough endowment people will look the other way.
