Sprite2K
I will be going silent soon here on Diary Land because I was appointed a secret cardinal by Pope John Paul II and will need to go to the Vatican soon to help elect a new Pope. The procedure is simple really. We each get a ballot and write down who we wish to be the next Pope, eventually we need to find a way to break the tie and that is where the real fun begins. I will be back as soon as we have a new Pope.
I have reading glasses now and should be able to read and write much better, very soon. They make me look like an old man � but my sister insists that they make me look like a hip old man. I just want to be an old man with my own hips. No glasses, please.
Today at Church, the Pastor gave a sermon on the eight deadly sin, Gossip. I thought there were only seven deadly sins but if I were going to add an eight it would be �retardation.� This man is really stupid and I think that is the most grieving sin of all: an idiot given a pulpit.
This sermon was about one person that he does not like because she does not agree with everything he says and does. The Pastor�s wife is the gossip but apparently not liking the Pastor, or his family, and not liking all of his ideas are considered gossip. The woman being accused is very sweet and volunteers a lot here.
The whole thing was such a spectacle that the other pastor got down from the altar and walked out of church. That sends, in my opinion, a very powerful message to the rest of us about what he thinks. I would have done the same but I was sitting by my boss and she whispered, �if we leave they will think it involves us.�
I think it involves everyone when the church is going in the wrong direction, and you are always in the wrong direction if your moral compass is some man�s ego.
To celebrate Spritopias 2000 Kipp and I are pleased to announce Special Edition Inaction Figures to commemorate the denizens of our world
Special Edition Spritopias
Comes with interchangeable J. Crew argyle or urban outfitters combo, iPod, sharpie pen, Starbucks cup, camera phone and carb counter
Special Edition Kipp
Comes with Emo glasses, iPod, Starbucks cup, Buzz Net stalker, camera phone and cup cakes
Special Edition Suburban Island comes with Starbucks Cup, Chinese Take-out, cell-phone and teenager-in-tow Suburban Strategy sold separately
Special Edition Chaos Bean
Comes with luxury chocolates, iPod and cell phone (windshield not included)
Special Edition Mary J
Comes with Minnesota accent, grade book, papers to grade, psychopathic principal and engagement ring
Special Edition Alex Vance
Comes with digital camera and witty comments
Special Edition Betty Already
Comes with charming children, Starbucks cup and Bert�s Bee�s Heart Breaking kit�
Special Edition Yvonne
Comes with teenage sons, digital camera, a small zoo of domesticated animals, and Mondays to herself � SUV with son�s girlfriends optional
Special Edition Golf Widow
Comes with Up Cheer, Snark and �GOLFWIDOWPUFF� costume
Special Edition Colleen
Teeth that aren�t teeth (but pearls), huge rolls of drafting paper and an embarrassing lack of alcohol tolerance
More Figures Coming Soon
